Messy Kids Toys – Calming the toy chaos at your place
“Should it stay, or should it go?” Even for an adult, the decision is complicated for our conscious mind to compute. Why? Because our subconscious is adding in lots of ‘helpful’ factors for consideration at the same time. E.g. if you know the 1982 song by The Clash who’s name sounds similar to this question it’s probably been plucked outta subconscious’ storage and is playing in your head right now. Go on, Sing it! Should I stay or should I go now….
It’s the same for our kids. Should I keep it? Will I ever have something like this again? What if someone else keeps theirs but I threw mine out? When can I have more of these? I can’t imagine living without it… More is happening in their minds than they can reason with. They look at a toy or something they made and their subconscious takes the reigns. Furiously. After having 4 children in 4 ½ years in a smallish home, this subject is a biggie for me. My kids are still at home. I’m in the thick of it… Like most areas of life, they need guidance to help them learn to Control Their Stuff, so it’s not the other way around. Here’s a few ideas you can use to help your lil’ people:
How did we get too many toys???
- It’s normal, and right, that a kid’s life should be about expansion at this age. So toys simply follow suit. They naturally want lots, make lots and keep lots.
- The successful toys are the ones they actually get out to play with. The ones kept neatly put away are the duds. The duds are taking up space.
- Decide how much space your home actually allows for toy storage. Weigh up the fact that toys are tools of learning and some are necessary, with the fact a happy functioning family is even more important. Then store just that many toys. Kids ‘lucky’ enough to have space for lots of toys will always struggle to control the mess.
- Once you’ve reached that point of ‘enough’ then the common wisdom is ‘one in, one out’ Kids are too smart for this. They’ll swap an eraser for a bean bag. Try ‘volume in, volume out’.
- Stored pictures and artwork (incl. half-finished stuff) can be a minefield. Have a box/draw for flat ones where new items go in the top and you selectively remove and discard from the bottom. If it’s good, take a photo and make an online file of artwork to keep. They’ll appreciate this more when they’re older. Same for larger artwork they make. Hide it all away for a few weeks to see if they miss it.
- Some toys only have one use and don’t need imagination or problem solving. Efficiency fails I reckon.
- Living in a clearer space will help them in ways a 1000 cheap toys couldn’t.
- Toys are cool, but human connection is better. If you can, aim to spend some time with them most days. Honestly, it’s hard combining attention spans. If they’re 3yrs old, try 3 minutes. 10yrs? Try 10 minutes.
Keeping the toys tidy
- Explain to them that cool stuff will be comin’ at them their entire lives. Truckloads. Show them everything that’s come into the house in the last week! They’ll never have to worry they won’t have enough. Let it be like a constantly flowing stream, in and out, instead of a destructive tsunami that keeps coming in with nowhere to go.
- Some people find rotating toy boxes works for them. I tried this and lasted about 3 rotations before my enthusiasm for it dried up – was just another job added to my list.
- Use the more annoying toys as bargaining tools or just for special occasions. Store them out of reach.
- Keep heirloom toys in a prominent place so you can see if they’re being looked after properly
- Toys that drive you insane and make you an angry parent are NOT the best toys to keep, no matter how much our little army protests. Cut yourself some personal slack and draw a line in the sand. It’s best for everyone.
Pick 3 of these ideas to try, then come back to let me know in a few weeks how it went. Lot’s of parents call me for 1-on1 help sorting out the kids rooms. They discover so many new ideas and concepts [that I can’t squeeze into a blog] to fit THEIR family, the annoyance from children’s clutter melts away. It’s fast and sets the children up to have that success for the rest of their lives. Neomi, a 10yr old ‘lover of stuff’ I helped from Auckland put it well when she said: “I didn’t realise it was so easy to keep my room clean!” Call or email me if you’re ready for the quick long term solution.